It has been far too long since I have last sat down & blogged. Lots has happened & changed. But I'm going to start blogging more. I think it's a good outlet for me.
I'm feeling overwhelmed at t moment & need somewhere to get it all out. I'm drowning in my emotions... Some good, some bad. Lots of things are happening at once & I'm having a hard time processing it all.
Jeremy is working more & seems to be miserable with his job. But is doing it because he has to provide for our family. Which breaks my heart knowing I can't do anything to make his pain any better. I know he hates it & is so stressed and exhausted by the time he gets home. I miss him on top of it all, yet don't want to bombard when he gets home. He plays with the kids, eats dinner & usually passes out shortly after that. :(
Bry will be coming home tomorrow for the summer. Which is happy , yet stressful all at the same time. We always have a hard time the first few weeks. He struggles getting back into the routine of things here. Which is hard on everyone. Then he gets a bit homesick for his mom. It's wonderful that he loves his mom so much. I just wish he could see how much more she should be doing for him! He gets upset that we actually make him act like a responsible 12 year old. She really holds him back & babies him for some stuff & then doesn't hold him responsible for other things. Which makes it extremely difficult when we have him.
Jeremy is harping on me again about getting my licence. Which I want to. But as I've explained to him many times. I'm terrified of driving the stupid van! I know how to drive. I just hate driving the van! It is too big & it freaks me out. I have super anxiety over. I have been in several t-bone accidents. And tend to stress myself out! It's not that I don't want to drive. I REALLY do. It's just I'm scared shit less! I know I need to put my big girl pants on & just do it! I'm hoping we can get me a little car & I can get it this year! 2013 is going to be the year! It will be a HUGE help to our family! & relieve a TON of stress from Jeremy's shoulders!
Also been working on getting healthy & loosing weight! Frustrating battle! I'm not the heaviest I've ever been. But too damn close! I've been eating better & working out. Ye am having such a hard time shedding the weight. Not helping my self esteem at all! But it'll come off in time I guess!
That's it for now... I'm sure more will be coming soon :)
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